tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post5265687268326269247..comments2023-10-20T06:41:31.943-07:00Comments on Visits to Candyland: One down, but two spring up.Elena LaVictoirehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18108910015959872763noreply@blogger.comBlogger34125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-53367193135240188942008-08-27T09:24:00.000-07:002008-08-27T09:24:00.000-07:00I agree! I was reserving judgment on the two new ...I agree! I was reserving judgment on the two new blogs, but I've really been blown away by Come Out of Her. I had read some of those stories in other forms, but scattered here and there, with weeks in between. It really has an impact to see them all gathered together in one place. Great idea, Anymommy!<BR/><BR/>CIL also seems more subdued than the original CIALFP. Hopefully it will continue to tread the fine line between gossip, and discussing possible falsehoods on Candy's site. I'm still giving that one more time to see what it turns into.Kellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16120027058653022897noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-83320978712569187792008-08-27T05:21:00.000-07:002008-08-27T05:21:00.000-07:00I've been reading both of those blogs now since th...I've been reading both of those blogs now since they started. What strikes me is that CIL has a community feel to it. They have their own lexicon. And they support each other. What's more, they also graciously accept into their fold Candy-followers who have been hurt by KTH in some way or another, for example the appearance this week of Shannon. It is kind of a remarkable and I think neat thing to watch. The moderators seem to be putting more thought into their postings as well.<BR/><BR/>Come Out of Here is cyber therapy. We can read and sympathize with the writers who have been hurt by the KTH blog. That pain is real. That hurt has affected their real lives. I think it stunning to realize what a negative affect KTH has had on so many people.Elena LaVictoirehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18108910015959872763noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-52063912436090263312008-08-26T22:00:00.000-07:002008-08-26T22:00:00.000-07:00Nancy-Thank you for your kind comment. You have hi...Nancy-<BR/>Thank you for your kind comment. You have hit the nail on the head as to the purpose of Come Out of Her.<BR/><BR/>What "some people" can't seem to accept is that Candy is not a victim; she victimizes. It is dangerous to underestimate the damage she has done and continues to do.<BR/><BR/>A person who has been wronged wants and needs redress. Candy refuses to be confronted on her blog. I give people a place where they can tell their side, in a respectful manner, and start to heal their hurting hearts.<BR/><BR/>We owe many thanks to Elena who saw the signs and was the first to start speaking out.anymommyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06316888519644205990noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-75996695571126809592008-08-26T20:24:00.000-07:002008-08-26T20:24:00.000-07:00Lindsay,I think that's the crux of the problem. I...Lindsay,<BR/><BR/>I think that's the crux of the problem. If Candy wants to air her opinions, great. If people want to agree with her, great. If commenters are OK with Candy editing their comments, great.<BR/><BR/>Otherwise...???<BR/><BR/>I know I'm not the only person to carefully construct a civil, reasoned response to Candy's anti-Catholic, biased blog posts who've seen their efforts ignored or rebuffed. I also know that Candy's "facts" about the Catholic Church are anything but fact.<BR/><BR/>I choose to post here because I've finally found a forum for respectful dissention. I'm sure that if I were to disagree with something Elena or Kelly wrote, my comment would appear, regardless. That's a refreshing change from my many futile attempts to convince Candy to post comments that didn't line up with her position (she is happy to publish comments that support her, including mine).<BR/><BR/>I guess I'm just 100% American at heart. My right to free speech really means something to me...and I will respect yours, too. What I have trouble tolerating is selective publishing/editing, a la Candy.<BR/><BR/>PS - Anymommy, I love your blog because of its respectful tone. It seems like a place where people who've been hurt can share their stories and find some peace. Thank you for keeping the tone of your blog peaceful and respectful!NancyPhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12949501690201484739noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-8429216386069816952008-08-26T18:28:00.000-07:002008-08-26T18:28:00.000-07:00Well, I've made several comments on KTH similar to...Well, I've made several comments on KTH similar to what I've posted here. None of which have ever been posted of course.Linds84https://www.blogger.com/profile/00966226397960302903noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-54707776186042388382008-08-26T17:44:00.000-07:002008-08-26T17:44:00.000-07:00Very true Kelly!However I started out on My Domest...Very true Kelly!<BR/><BR/>However I started out on My Domestic Church blogging about Candy in April 2007. I think the "Elena and her minions" post came out shortly thereafter. <BR/><BR/>Lindsay, were you a "minion?"Elena LaVictoirehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18108910015959872763noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-78049333671737499242008-08-26T17:38:00.000-07:002008-08-26T17:38:00.000-07:00Angie, even if they did, we wouldn't know it, beca...Angie, even if they did, we wouldn't know it, because she sure wouldn't publish it!Kellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16120027058653022897noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-47081280162892106132008-08-26T17:28:00.000-07:002008-08-26T17:28:00.000-07:00Angie, you wrote exactly what I was thinking:)Angie, you wrote exactly what I was thinking:)Tracyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01038639159416547700noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-22756163622004875112008-08-26T12:51:00.000-07:002008-08-26T12:51:00.000-07:00Do any of these people that come here and complain...Do any of these people that come here and complain that two wrongs don't make a right ever complain to Candy that her writing is offensive, or is everyone so scared of her that they just leave her alone?angiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18188881904597936902noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-3810625092144339412008-08-26T09:25:00.000-07:002008-08-26T09:25:00.000-07:00Lindsay, I get that you don't approve of the other...Lindsay, I get that you don't approve of the other sites. I didn't agree with much of what happened at CiALaFP blog. I think the new blogs have a different feel to them and I'd like to give them a few weeks to get established. I haven't added any to the blog roll yet. <BR/><BR/> I hope you understand that if I find something interesting, worthwhile, related, to what we talk about here on VTC, then it is my prerogative to talk, post or link about it here. That's the neat thing about blogging. <BR/><BR/>Obviously not everyone is going to agree with everything. That's fine. You don't have to. But I'm going to try to continue to blog honestly and with integrity.Elena LaVictoirehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18108910015959872763noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-75089843828804267692008-08-26T08:49:00.000-07:002008-08-26T08:49:00.000-07:00Honestly, I'm beginning to feel like no one is get...Honestly, I'm beginning to feel like no one is getting my point. Angie, I never said that Candy is right in posting her garbage. My whole point is the 2 wrongs don't make a right! She's being inappropriate by attacking the Catholic Church. But so are you by posting links to and participating in blogs like CIALAFP. It's not "venting" it's not "human nature" it's GOSSIP!!! Isn't the whole point of Christianity to overcome so called "human nature" and be a better person? There's obviously no point in continuing this since you're all determined to carry on with gossip and back-biting. Well whatever you know who you'll have to answer to eventually.Linds84https://www.blogger.com/profile/00966226397960302903noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-87920268099581578182008-08-25T12:46:00.000-07:002008-08-25T12:46:00.000-07:00Lindsay- I am a commenter here, and I am a comment...Lindsay- I am a commenter here, and I am a commenter at what you call the "hate-blog." I've never made one comment about Candy's dress size, appearance, children, or anything that resembles those categories. However, you can speak freely there, and sometimes you need to be able to do that when you've been insulted to the core of your being. It's called being human. If you did read there, you would find some people poking fun at the "Candy-isms," but you would also find a lot of intelligent people finding the other thousand reasons why Candy is not a credible source of information for her readers. There have been many examples of regular readers of Candy's blog seeing the truth for what it really is, so I think that so-called "hate-blog" has served some people really well.<BR/><BR/>The ladies here are very classy and well-educated on their faith, and to judge them for defending our faith against lies and saying it's perfectly alright for Candy to publish the garbage she does should make you question your thought process in coming to that conclusion.angiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18188881904597936902noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-43515313885354496312008-08-24T13:29:00.000-07:002008-08-24T13:29:00.000-07:00Barbara C said: "I agree that anymommy's new blog ...Barbara C said: "I agree that anymommy's new blog should not have been lumped in with the other two links, by Lindsay or in this post."<BR/><BR/>Thank you! Candy will not be able to ignore my blog for long. The number of private comments I am receiving from women who feel really hurt and betrayed by her and her blog has surprised me. They are in pain--they feel deceived--and they are angry. They NEED a place to tell their stories. They want to be heard. Candy refuses to post their comments when they send them to her, so I give them a place to say what they need to say.<BR/><BR/>What I don't give them is a place to be sarcastic and mean. However, I see a need for that place to exist, and just the fact that it does exist speaks volumes about the kind of feelings Candy is stirring up. She cannot continue to judge people without calling down judgement on herself.<BR/><BR/>Sorry to rant, but I am insulted and offended, because this person obviously has not spent one second looking at the (often painful) stories of the dear women who have had the courage to tell the truth about their experiences with Candy at my blog.anymommyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06316888519644205990noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-69393526382612425882008-08-24T12:28:00.000-07:002008-08-24T12:28:00.000-07:00Interestingly Candy pretends that none of these bl...Interestingly Candy pretends that none of these blogs (VTC included) exist. <BR/><BR/>I'm not built that way. They're out there and I've acknowledged their existence. They send readers this way and most bloggers would reciprocate. <BR/><BR/> I trust our readers are mature enough to handle their online time in ways they find to be the most beneficial to themselves, their families and their on and off line communities.Elena LaVictoirehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18108910015959872763noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-66319122056098345382008-08-24T12:26:00.000-07:002008-08-24T12:26:00.000-07:00See that's the thing, I don't disagree with you. (...See that's the thing, I don't disagree with you. (mostly) I just would love to see you stick to your mission statement a little more closely and keep out the junior high stuff. I know you don't "owe me an explanation" but what about your other readers? How do you justify gossip in a Christian blog? Why not stick to the issues?Linds84https://www.blogger.com/profile/00966226397960302903noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-35883886873415917262008-08-24T12:13:00.000-07:002008-08-24T12:13:00.000-07:00I agree that anymommy's new blog should not have b...I agree that anymommy's new blog should not have been lumped in with the other two links, by Lindsay or in this post. <BR/><BR/>I totally understand that the original posting of the link for the hate-blog was to show a contrast with the respectful discussion of VTC. However, it (and now it's new link) has been posted three times in recent months. The more you direct people to it the more it "appears" like you condone and agree with what they are doing. And by seeming to condone that blog, it comes off kind of hypocritical and undermines the apologetic tone of this blog. "We won't let you talk bad about Candy on this blog, but we'll direct you to this blog where you can say all the nasty stuff you want." Know what I mean? It reminds me of a Catholic husband allowing his non-Catholic wife to use the birth control so that by the letter of the law he's not the one sinning.<BR/><BR/>That being said, anyone who actually reads this blog regularly <BR/>knows that it is not about competition, spite, or jealousy. And not every post is a response to Candy's wild accusations. There have been some very good ones about various Catholic issues and even things that Catholics might have in common with Candy. And that's why many of the regulars enjoy this blog so much.Barbara C.https://www.blogger.com/profile/03568254165279635079noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-83546282158729556982008-08-24T12:08:00.000-07:002008-08-24T12:08:00.000-07:00Well I never claimed to have an credibility since ...<I>Well I never claimed to have an credibility since I know that I don't. I was pointing out that you are losing yours because of posts like this. </I><BR/><BR/>Judging by our stats, I don't think so. In fact VTC is doing very well and I think we have a positive reputation in this part of the blogosophere. And also judging by comments and e-mails I think we have snagged a few from Candy's readership as well. <BR/><BR/><BR/><I>But you should know that calling someone a troll just because they disagree with you is pretty ridiculous.</I><BR/><BR/>Well it's not just disagreement that goes with the label. Stick around Lindsay, discuss and debate in a friendly manner and you could move up to "friendly adversary" status - which is always a good thing!Elena LaVictoirehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18108910015959872763noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-88287242747434113482008-08-24T12:06:00.000-07:002008-08-24T12:06:00.000-07:00But you should know that calling someone a troll j...<I>But you should know that calling someone a troll just because they disagree with you is pretty ridiculous.</I><BR/><BR/>No, I'd call you a troll because you only post inflammatory comments making accusations and calling us names, and then don't show up again for long periods of time. <BR/><BR/>You've never responded to my request to point out comments which are attacking Candy as a person. You've never posted in a polite tone, that I can remember.Kellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16120027058653022897noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-90467219595039541412008-08-24T12:00:00.000-07:002008-08-24T12:00:00.000-07:00Well I never claimed to have an credibility since ...Well I never claimed to have an credibility since I know that I don't. I was pointing out that you are losing yours because of posts like this. But you should know that calling someone a troll just because they disagree with you is pretty ridiculous. I'm not trolling, most of the time I just read and move on. But if you'd rather no dissenting comments then I understand, after all you'd be doing it for different reasons than Candy right? She's censoring, you're just weeding out trolls. Getting angry and insulting me just shows that I've struck a nerve. Oh and by the way it's Lindsay not Lindsey.Linds84https://www.blogger.com/profile/00966226397960302903noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-86442502356229312622008-08-24T11:52:00.000-07:002008-08-24T11:52:00.000-07:00First of all Lindsey- you have ZERO credibility. ...First of all Lindsey- you have ZERO credibility. Anyone with a computer and a modem can hide behind an unavailable profile and stir the pot on blogs and message boards. It's called trolling. I wouldn't say you're particularly good at it either. With that in mind let me fisk the rest of your remarks:<BR/><BR/><I>So basically what all of you are saying is that "well she does it so why can't we?"</I><BR/><BR/>No one said anything remotely like that Lindsey, but feel free to share the wording that led you to believe that. <BR/><BR/><BR/><I> What ever happened to being the bigger person? </I><BR/><BR/>You're being allowed to comment here aren't you? I guarantee that most of us are not given that right over on Candy's blog - at least not without having our remarks heavily censored or manipulated. The fact that this blog and the others even ALLOW dissenting voices at all is being more ethical, or the bigger person.<BR/><BR/><I><BR/>I will absolutely state that I agree with the majority of posts regarding KTH and the Church and that Candy is intolerable as well as intolerant. Yet it's posts like this that make you all ridiculous and spiteful.</I><BR/><BR/>I've said all along that Candy has to own some of the anger and hatred she has stirred up for herself over the years. She also says by you can judge something by the fruits. Well the fruits of Candy's ill treatment of her readers over the years is the loud outcry over the past year in the form of all of these other blogs popping up to oppose hers. And by the way Lindsey, we get e-mails regularly about how this blog has changed minds and lives. I'll bet the others are too.<BR/><BR/><BR/><I> Elena you still haven't explained why you posted those links in the first place.</I><BR/><BR/>I don't owe you an explanation. However I'm all about providing links and information. Ever see my other blog? That two more blogs are opposing Candy is worth a link or two. <BR/><BR/><I> Honestly I just think its in poor taste to post a link to a blog that went to over 200 comments on a discussion of Candy's dress size.</I><BR/><BR/>Then honestly, go over there and complain about it. <BR/><BR/><I> If you want to debate her on the issues then more power to you but this catty sniping just kills any credibility you might have had</I><BR/><BR/>Says you. And I believe I already covered what that's worth.Elena LaVictoirehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18108910015959872763noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-63746462553187868152008-08-24T11:38:00.000-07:002008-08-24T11:38:00.000-07:00So basically what all of you are saying is that "w...So basically what all of you are saying is that "well she does it so why can't we?" What ever happened to being the bigger person? I will absolutely state that I agree with the majority of posts regarding KTH and the Church and that Candy is intolerable as well as intolerant. Yet it's posts like this that make you all ridiculous and spiteful. Elena you still haven't explained why you posted those links in the first place. Honestly I just think its in poor taste to post a link to a blog that went to over 200 comments on a discussion of Candy's dress size. If you want to debate her on the issues then more power to you but this catty sniping just kills any credibility you might have hadLinds84https://www.blogger.com/profile/00966226397960302903noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-555821906735825162008-08-23T19:27:00.000-07:002008-08-23T19:27:00.000-07:00You know, I take very serious offense to my new bl...You know, I take very serious offense to my new blog being called garbage. I have purposely created a place that is NOT offensive. I state very plainly on the first page that personal attacks ARE NOT tolerated. The whole purpose of "Come Out of Her" is to show how may of us have fallen for Candy's falsehoods and make-believe home life. I feel bad for all the other homemakers, like myself, who were made to feel completely inadequate because we don't measure up in Candy's world.<BR/>My blog is a ministry to Candy's readers--a much more heartfelt and real ministry than she feels she has to Catholics and unbelievers.anymommyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06316888519644205990noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-29024805013352410892008-08-23T07:10:00.000-07:002008-08-23T07:10:00.000-07:00Re: Candy and her 'opinions'We get a lot of commen...Re: Candy and her 'opinions'<BR/><BR/>We get a lot of comments about 'that's her opinion and she's entitled to it".<BR/>In fact, that was the whole gist of the Homeschool Blog Awards's reply to our objections to Candy's content and links.<BR/><BR/>But opinions are based on facts and if your facts are wrong, then your opinion, no matter how sincere, will be erroneous.<BR/><BR/>I'll give you an example:<BR/>True fact: my daughter and her family live with her husband's mom.<BR/>Opinion: wow, your son-in-law must ba real loser!<BR/><BR/>True fact: they moved 1000 miles away to help her with his dad, who was terminally ill. When his dad died unexpectedly, shortly after they arrived, they got out of their lease and moved in with her to keep her company, help her close the house and save rent money for the move back home.<BR/>Opinion: wow, your daughter and son-in-law are great children!<BR/><BR/>It's all in having the right facts and the whole picture.<BR/>Now, Candy has been shown, repeatedly, that her facts about the Catholic Church are erroneous. And not just from Catholic sources, but general reference as well, especially where her fantasy 'histories' are concerned.<BR/>But she continees to ignore these corrections or to dismiss them as special pleading.<BR/><BR/>This is why we conclude that she is not acting in good will, regardless of how much she says she loves Catholics.<BR/><BR/>No competition, but correction. Here, because she won't allow it in her comments.Salhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13201226644704622876noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-41851854864165088042008-08-23T07:04:00.000-07:002008-08-23T07:04:00.000-07:00Well said Elena!!!!Well said Elena!!!!Tracyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01038639159416547700noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-853207333094285361.post-3410931569224140182008-08-23T06:35:00.000-07:002008-08-23T06:35:00.000-07:00Just an FYI 23/yo and Lindsey - we put our butts o...Just an FYI 23/yo and Lindsey - we put our butts on the line here for the sake of our convictions. And we've paid a price for it. Candy has no jealousy or spite? Perhaps she had a lapse in judgment then when she posted the name of my street and a photo of my home on the web? <BR/><BR/>And perhaps it is just a fluke that she manipulates people's comments or just doesn't publish them since she's so secure and all.<BR/><BR/>She chooses not to debate because she cannot debate. She would lose.Elena LaVictoirehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18108910015959872763noreply@blogger.com