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Saturday, June 14, 2008

Where Do They Find The Time?

Candy has mentioned the "anti-Candy blog" a few times now on her site. Whenever she does this, you can count on two things. First, everyone gets curious, hits google, and we get a lot of new visitors. Second, there is a chorus of comments on her blog along the lines of "Surely so-called Christian women should be spending time on their homes and families instead of wasting so much time on a blog."

Since so many women have expressed a concern about our personal lives, I thought I would address that concern. Really, I think it is a matter of perspective. We all find time in our day for things that are important to us, and things that we find relaxing. Many people watch television in the evening. Other people exercise, or read a book. Most people have hobbies. Think of this blog as something that Elena, Erika, and I find important, and something that has become our hobby.

Candy is clearly a busy person, as you can see by her daily schedule on her sidebar. Yet, she maintains a blog that is updated almost daily. In addition, she has written several e-books, totaling over 500 pages in length! Yet, no one seems to feel that she is wasting time that should be spent on her family. She views her work as a ministry, and so do we.

Candy maintains her blog and e-books alone. Visits To Candyland is a group blog. Currently, there are three bloggers, although Elena and I do the majority of the posting. At times Elena is busy, and I handle more of the writing. This past week, I wrote a few posts, but Elena spent more time here. Often, when there is a lull between Candy's Catholic posts, we won't post at all for a week. So we share the workload, and as we don't update daily the way Candy does, the workload is sporadic.

Finally, just for the record, I do almost all of my blog writing during two specific times of the day. I have an hour during my baby's nap where my older children have "quiet time" and I use that hour for computer time. I check my e-mail, blogs, and write a post if I have a topic in mind. Then, after the children are in bed, I have usually several hours before I go to bed. While I once spent a full three hours writing a post, usually I spend less than an hour in the evening on the computer. Usually, if there isn't anything pressing, I use my evening time for relaxing with my husband or reading and don't do more than check my e-mail before bed.

Actually, I think running a "gossip blog" would be much less time consuming. I could just make up some story and throw it up here. In reality, I do spend time researching my articles. It is important that the information people get here reflect actual Catholic doctrine, so if I am unsure of something, I don't just guess, I look it up. I try to provide resources for additional information. In my last post, about the history of anti-Catholicism in America, I spent a lot of time visiting various reputable history sites on the web. I'm not sure if anyone noticed, but only one or two of the links were to Catholic sites. I tried to choose non-Catholic sites so no one could accuse me of present a "Catholic version" of history.

Outside of that one to two hours on the internet, I clean house, cook, educate my children, run errands, take children to activities, visit my 98 year old grandfather, walk the dog, and all those other things that people do during their daily life. I don't make my bread from scratch, or sew clothing, or embroider or scrapbook. Sadly, nor do I exercise much. But I love theology and debating, and so most of my free time is taken up with reading books on theology, discussing theology, and writing theology-centered posts for this blog.

So, I hope this clears up the question of whether or not we are neglecting our homes and children while running the Visits To Candyland blog.


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55 comments:

Perplexity said...

I often think that when resorting to the claim that someone spends too much time on something, to the neglect of their families, is simply a fall-back argument. When there isn't something constructive to say, resorting to insults about a person's priorities is not unusual.

None of us lives the lives of anyone else, so none of us knows how any of the others manage their time.

Everyone has different priorities, different obligations, different children, different spouses, different homes - different lives, period. There is no way anyone can know that time on the computer causes neglect of family or any other responsibility.

kritterc said...

Oh Kelly - I have never thought you were neglecting your family. I am sooo glad you wrote about this. There have been many times that I wanted to respond to Candy's followers about the family-home neglect accusations. I just did not know how to put my feelings concerning their comments into words without sounding hateful. Keep up the good work.

Elena said...

My home is pristine, my homeschooled children well fed on homegrown, homemade meals and doing school work three years ahead of their peers, I run 10 miles a day and teach a jazzercise class, as well as say the rosary observe the liturgy of the hours and attend daily mass. Additionally my man is well satisfied and happy!

And I owe it all to my handy, dandy home management binder!

Kelly said...

Oh, I didn't think our regulars here were lying awake nights, worrying about my children. But people do stop by from Candy's out of morbid curiosity, so I wanted to address the issue.

Of course, I had intended to get it up yesterday, while we were getting 500 new visitors, but because I put my family first, it had to wait until today.

Elena, I guess I should go through HMBU, because you're WAY ahead of me! ;)

Kelly said...

Oops, corrected all those typos!

KitKat said...

Hi Elena, I am just posting this comment that I sent to Candy's blog here since it didn't make the cut over there. Please feel free to delete it if it does not meet the commenting guidelines although I tried very hard to be polite. Sorry that it is so long.

"I am pretty certain that this comment won't be published, but I am going to give it a try anyway. I am also pretty sure that I am going to get some not-so-nice responses from some of this blog readers, but I am going to say this anyway.

Yes, this IS Candy's blog. She CAN say whatever she wants. It doesn't mean that she *should*. There are plenty of other homemaking blogs out there with content that is just as good or superior to the content on this blog that are maintained by Christian women. They, just like Candy, share their faith on a daily basis. But they DON'T target a specific denomination as being wrong or "cult-like".

Ladies, we are all Christians. We all love the Lord. But there are widely different interpretations of the Bible even among Protestants. Honestly, ask yourselves why you enjoy Candy's anti-Catholicism posts (if you even do). Closely examine why you feel that they are beneficial to a Protestant Christian or to a Roman Catholic. Do you really think that a practicing Roman Catholic woman who truly knows her faith would read what is written and become "saved"? Or do you think that it would hurt her heart because if she has any real knowledge of her Catholic faith she would find it offensive and inaccurate? Do you really need to hurt or anger someone in order to make them believe? Do you think that a Protestant woman would find these anti-Catholic articles relevant to her daily life? If she comes from certain branches of Protestant Christianity, she probably already has an unfavorable opinion of Catholicism. So in essence these articles are "preaching to the choir", if you will, and hurting other Sisters in Christ in the process.

I am sure that there are many of you who will be angry with me or tell me to go to another web site and go away. And that is fine, you are entitled to feel that way. But a Roman Catholic woman is also entitled to feel very hurt when her faith is presented in a way that she she knows to be untrue by a website that she otherwise enjoys. The Internet is a wonderful and strange place. You can say anything that you want and back it up with the "Freedom of Speech" line. But Freedom of Speech comes with a great responsibility. Are we meeting that responsibility when we tear each other down in such a manner? Or are we just guilty of the same thing that non-believers have accused Christians of for many years - that we can't even peacefully co-exist without tearing each other apart??

Have a blessed day and a wonderful weekend."

Blondie said...
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Blondie said...

I think their accusations are just ridiculous and immature. It annoys me that they would even make someone here feel she has to defend herself when it comes to personal time management.

Tracy said...

Excellent as always Kelly:)

Blondie said...

Kitkat,
That was a very nice, well thought out comment you left and there was nothing rude about it. I thought you sounded kind, loving, and humble. There is one reason and one reason only that it didn't get posted on keepingthehome: you disagreed with Candy.

Saved Sinner said...

Time management is just soemthing people say when they can't think of anything better to say against what you are doing. One reason I took three weeks to write the long comment I wrote to Candy was that I was giving it careful thought but the other was that I did not have the time to write it more quickly. I often read and comment while breastfeeding my daughter (which takes up an average of two hours a day spread over four feeds) so that can give the impression I spend all day on the computer.

Nancy Parode said...

Kitkat,

I think your comment is great. It says everything I've always wanted Candy to know about the effects of her posts, comments and readers' replies on me, personally.

I hope some of her readers do take time to come over here and read your thoughtful comment.

Tracy said...

kitkat, I think what you said is wonderful and I pray that some ears, eyes and hearts will be open.
Unfortuneatley, Candy and many people with an unfavorable view of the Catholic faith will merely say they are called to tell us the truth and try to save us, I've posted on Catholic.com message boards many times in the "non Catholic" section where some excellent debates take place, I tell you what, people who see us as wrong feel they are being called to tell us how wrong we are and they actually think they are doing us a huge favor and that someday we will thank them for it... I know.. hard to swallow, but that is how they believe. But, your post is a start I think, your writing with christian charity and that is all you can do, it may not reach Candy or her readers but God knows you tried and we know you tried and that is what counts!!

Nancy Parode said...

Kitkat,

What Tracy said, but more...you never, ever know who listens to what you say, or reads what you write. You may be helping someone you will never know. Please don't think your efforts are in vain, even if Candy won't post them, because someone needing just your words may find his/her way here and read your eloquent post.

Jennifer Sr. said...
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Jennifer Sr. said...

Here's a cut and paste from a fundamentalist baptist site:

"Biblical Separation is the Bible's clear command that true Christians are to remain separate from all personal, social, and ecclesiastical relationships with those who call themselves Christians, but want to live a life of sin. Fundamentalist Baptists therefore remain separate from apostate Protestantism as well remaining separate from The Great Whore of Roman Catholicism mentioned in Chapter 17 of the Book of Revelation..."

wow.

Katrina said...

Hello Ladies. I’m a very Proud Catholic, but there's a lot of people that don’t understand the Catholic faith and this could be a very good resource for people to turn to. At the moment all one sees is someone said this and someone said that. It must be very embarrassing to the Ladies (Who are not Catholic!) who are being talked about, whose comments are plastered all over this website from this other blog. They may be attacking our faith, but not any person in particular. This lady claims no denomination. She states on her blog that she is a Bible believing Christian. She has her beliefs, we have ours. Catholics have always had to deal with this negativity, and this lady is very good at providing (what she claims) evidence for all her beliefs, which is very impressionable, especially for our young ones. It’s very easy to get to her website from here. This website is a brilliant source of information, but a lot of people haven’t got time or just don’t want to read between the lines. I know you’ve had a lot more readers coming to this site, but in reality, it just seems to be making a lot of Catholics, especially the younger ones, think that maybe our Religion is wrong, and trust me, I’ve had plenty of experience with this lately, as have other Parishes. It would be an honour if one could say, come to this website, because this is what we need. We can’t change people, no matter how hard we try, but we can all help to change the attitudes towards Catholics by remaining gracious throughout, which i know you ladies are. Please don’t be offended, that isn’t my intention. I do this out of love, for you ladies and our faith.

Elena said...

I guess I'm missing your point Katrina. What is it exactly you want us to do?

Nancy Parode said...

Katrina,

I don't really understand your comment. The reason this blog exists is so that inaccurate statements about the Catholic faith made by Candy and her readers can be properly addressed and explained. The ladies who write this blog tried, initially, to explain these items at Candy's blog, but Candy only publishes certain comments. I know, because it's happened to me.

I cannot see how this blog could lead anyone to think that "maybe our Religion is wrong" because the ladies who write this blog meticulously cite their sources. They aren't writing anything you can't find in Catholic (and, in some cases, non-Catholic) resources.

It is our responsibility as Catholics to know the truths of our faith, and to continue to study the Bible throughout our lives so that our personal faith may grow. We can't let erroneous assertions about the Catholic faith go by without pointing out the errors - even if statements like these are made all the time. That would be like allowing racist remarks to be made in front of us without refuting them, just to give an example.

Perhaps I am reading your comment incorrectly. If so, I hope you will clarify matters.

Katrina said...

I'm not very good at this. I don't like getting into confrontations so please forgive me for anything that i may say that may offend someone. I know that this isn't/or doesn't seem to be a website for Catholics. It's just about one lady and her beliefs, who we have all been hurt by i'm sure, and trying to correct where we as Catholics feel that she is way out of order. After reading some of the comments that have been left on this ladies blog, one struck a chord with me. I'm not sure how it went but it was in the lines of "But that's what Catholics have always been like through the years, so why would we expect any different from these ladies."
That in itself really hurt/upset me. That was a direct accusation not to our Faith but to us as a person. The point i am trying to make is, You can't change how someone feels or what they believe, but you can lead them to the truth. In my parish, "us homemakers" get together once a month to catch-up, swap ideas etc.. Some of the younger ladies have found your wonderful site, but have also found the other one, Which on the suface looks to be a great homemaking blog. This lady is a very impressionable "I want to be that kinda Lady, mother, wife." When they see the disagrements going on, this lady is very good at providing what she thinks is evidence to back her up. We turn to your site to back us up. We're not ignorant of our faith, but you ladies do such an excellent thorough job of explaining. This is where the negative side comes in. These young ladies don't want to read between the lines. They want the information to be there, right in front of them, which is how it's percieved on that other site. This Parish, and others we have heard, have lost a number of members who have turned their back on their faith in belief that it's considered wrong. The point, (which i've seemed to have got away from)is that this is such a lovely informative site. You could do great things with this. I know that's not really your intention, but it's just a heartfelt plea from one Catholic to another.

Elena said...

Katrina, I'm still not totally understanding.

In one sentence, what is it specifically that you are asking?

Katrina said...

In one sentence. Maybe not one, but i will try. Catholics have always had hatred and ignorance directed at them, and yes through the years there have been atrocities through misguided Catholics, as with all religions. This site could be wonderful. But as it is, you are kind of acting in a way that Catholics have always been accused of. These ladies that you have plastered over this web page are bystanders of their own faith. Of course they will agree with 'one of their own.' It is upto us, as Catholics to act in a gracious way and correct the wrongs that they feel are wrong in a gracious way. Not by arguing about this and that. Yes it makes my blood boil, it deeply offends and hurts me what is being said out there, but to others, we are acting in the same way that Catholics have been believed to have acted throughout the years. (and please forgive me again for any ill feelings.)

Blondie said...

Katrina, I'm confused after reading your comments too. This is what I get from them, and I may be totally wrong: are you suggesting these ladies change the focus of this blog to being a homemaking blog?

If that's what you were suggesting, there are a lot of great homemaking links on the sidebar that have the same wonderful, practical information as Candy's, without being anti-Catholic. Perhaps you could check out some of those sites and see if there are any the young homemakers at your parish would enjoy.

However, the specific focus of this blog is apologetics.

Katrina said...

I'm not going to post again. But i'm going to try to help my daughter. I think you should know this is the reason for so many people turning their back on their faith. You are acting in a very hostile way to these ladies. You use their names etc.. The world over thinks that this is a Catholic trait. "You don't think like us, then you're wrong." Of course this other lady is acting this way, but she is being very careful and gracious. She may be attacking our faith, but not a person. There's no name calling, singling people out. Which is The way it should be done. Why would someone want to convert to being a Catholic if you ladies are keeping up the charade of how Catholics are wrongly percieved.
I really do not mean to offend you Ladies, but i know i will. You are all very strong headed women and i think this is what is wrong here.
Everyone has there OWN Belief. You can't make someone believe what you do. I know there is a need for this kind of website, and maybe one day there will, but this is just embarasing Ladies. And now i must get on my knees and beg for forgiveness. It's been a long time that i've had to use that kind of tone ladies.
Yours Faithfully as one
Deacon Peter

Blondie said...

Uh, Candy uses names all the time. That's how I first found Elena's other blog (before VTC existed)...I googled "Elena" "Catholic" and "keepingthehome".

As for being offended, I wasn't offended before, because I honestly couldn't understand the point of your comments. I'm still confused as to how we are supposed to be reacting to people when they lie and promote misconceptions about our Catholic faith, even after being corrected. We're not trying to convert anyone, just explain the TRUTHS of the faith, as opposed to the lies that Candy tells.

Katrina said...

I think i should explain about this after that. My Father is Deacon to our rather large Parish here in England. We have been having a lot of trouble with regards to your site. It has nothing to do with being a Homemaking Blog. My dear sweet father is a very sweet man, and yes he is praying for forgivness right now. It's been a very long time that i've seen him like that. I won't trouble you ladies again, but i hope, wish for you to think about what is being said. We really do need you to help promote the goodness of the Catholic Church and all of the wonderful things that goes with it. It is very embarrasing for these ladies who you are attacking. Attack the Faith, not the Person. (even though that's wrong it's something to think about.
Well i've kept you ladies for far too long. I wish you every happiness. Much Love my Sisters.

Elena said...

Well I'm not offended because I still don't understand what it is you are trying to say. Perhaps your father could drop me a line at elljazz@gmail.com.

Thanks for visiting Katrina.

Blondie said...

Where has any person been attacked on this blog?

Katrina, I don't understand why you and your father would leave comments and then say you won't be back, when truly I think there is a lack of communication here. I haven't really seen much that you or your father wrote that was offensive, and you have both spoken kindly. The only thing I see that can be taken offensively is saying that the Catholic bloggers on this site are attacking people personally, which I just don't see. I think they are putting forth a great effort not to do that.

Kelly said...

Okay Katrina, let me see if I am understanding you.

1. A group of women from your parish has been visiting this site, and Candy's site and discussing it at your group.

2. Because we take people's comments from Candy's site, and put them up on this website, that is being perceived as attacking women from the other site.

3. You feel there is a real need for us to correct the misinformation about Catholicism, because some of the young ladies in your group are finding Candy convincing. However, you wish we would stop addressing people from the other site by name, the young women are starting to see this as attacking the women who comment on the other site.

Well Katrina, normally when someone has a blog, such as Candy, when someone writes in a comment, then you can reply to that comment and make a response on the same page. However, Candy does not allow everyone to comment on her page. If she feels a post is defending Catholicism, she will not allow it be be posted on her page.

That is why this page was started. It is a way of addressing what Candy writes, but also comments which are left on her page. It is not meant to be a personal attack, but merely our chance to respond to the comments on that site.

While Candy can sometimes be gracious, she is not always so. This past week she said someone sent her "vile hateful" e-mail. She said the comment saved sinner left for her was "ridiculous" when you can read on her website that it was very polite. She told Angie that God had condemned her to hell.

I hope this helps to address your concerns. We do strive to be respectful and stay on the topic of Catholicism. Please alert us to any specific post or comment that you feel does not meet those standards. That may give us some idea of what you are seeing here that we aren't.

Tracy said...
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Nancy Parode said...

Katrina, I would like to add one more thing. For many people, blogs like Candy's can be weirdly fascinating. I found myself wondering what negative thing she would say next, and then I would get very depressed when she called my church a cult and mocked the Blessed Sacrament by calling it a "cracker". I came to the conclusion that I can never visit her site again because it is damaging my emotional well-being. I am very, very strong in my faith (at least, I think I am) and there is nothing anyone can say that would convince me that Jesus is NOT present in the Eucharist or that Mary is just like any person you'd meet on the street.

Perhaps what the ladies of your parish need is the resolve to stay away from sites like Candy's. It's hard, because anti-Catholics seem to have an endless fund of bizarre tales and allegations to fling at us. It's difficult to walk away from the lies.

For me, though, it's essential. I can work through this blog and by speaking with people I know in real life to spread the Gospel and be a true Christian example. I can't do that on Candy's blog - for one thing, she won't let me - and it's bad for my mental health.

Perhaps your parish homemakers' group could find other blogs and websites to visit, ones that are Catholic.

It's not up to Elena and the writers of this blog to keep anyone from reading any anti-Catholic blogs. It's up to Catholic believers, especially those who are parents, to learn to recognize harmful influences, whether they be TV shows, books, blogs, websites or magazines. If Candy's blog and the response of this blog's writers are troubling you because they have chosen to refute the falsehoods propagated by anti-Catholics (not just one person in particular, either), perhaps that has something to do with the dynamics of your parish or group, too. Certainly many readers here can read Candy's blog without spiralling into a depressed state, but I cannot. I have to stay away from there. I'm sure I'm not the only person in all of cyberspace with these issues.

Elena, please edit/delete this comment if you think it goes too far.

Erika S. said...

Katrina,

We here at VTC must address each individual as they an individual because each non-Catholic Christian has their own specific beliefs. It is very easy to address Catholics as a whole as we have a book, the Catechism, which plainly states our collected beliefs.
So I am sorry if people believe that we are attacking them, we are not we are just:

1. Answering questions that people have asked about the Catholic Faith

2. Refuting statements made by individuals that are out right lies

If anyone is upset by this I am sorry. This is a blog for adult conversation and discussion not for gossip and as it has been stated before if you can point out a specific place that is "gossip" it will be removed.

I hope that you and your Father are pointing out the horrible lies that are being stated over at Keeping the Home. If not you are doing them an injustice and also sinning because as Catholics we are called to instruct the ignorant and admonish the sinner.

Erika S. said...

Nancy-
I too struggle with depression over this whole thing. I also face anti-Catholic sentiment in my own neighborhood. It has and still is a very hard struggle for me. I will keep trying to fight the good fight but it gets hard. Hugs to you and to all that are saddened by this {{{{}}}}!!!

Nancy Parode said...

Erika,

How sad that you have neighbors who can't accept that you have found a spiritual home that is perfect for you. I will pray for you, particularly for your spiritual well-being, so you can continue to help spread the Good News here at VTC. {{{hugs for you, too!}}}

Tracy said...

Erika & Nancy, I too have resolved to not read Candy's site, it is not helping me at all. I will trust Elena and Kelly to bring anything that needs to be addressed about the Catholic church here to vtc and I will discuss it here, it is not worth it for me (even when I know it is all lies) lies still hurt:(

Benjamin said...
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Benjamin said...

I am not Catholic, but Methodist, and know very little about it the Catholic faith, but I have been learning about it since visiting this website. If anything, I find this site too kind to Candy and her blog. I find Candy's Catholic rants down right insulting. I know how offended I am by her posts, so Catholics must be outraged. Katrina confused me desperately, but I hope she looks at both this site and Candy's again, and can see a clearer picture of who is the truly offensive blogger.

Anne-Marie said...

I would also add that if Candy does not mention names and websites, etc, it's because she does not want her readers to come to a site like this one and see that, actually, Elena, Kelly, Erika and friends are polite, respectful, and well-informed.

I've seen her post things like, "This person is writing nasty things about me." When asked by her readers to provide a link she responds with, "I can't in good conscience allow my readers to read such filth." So no-one can make up their own minds, they have to take her word for it!

By contrast, this blog is very upfront about who they're dealing with. They even provide a link to her site at the top of the page. I think that's a lot more - what's the word? - honourable, and I commend the writers here for it.

Linda said...

I'm sure neither your or Candy's home gets neglected due to 'bloggy time'.. but ehmm....

What MY concern is.... Candy is writing a mostly positive blog. She helps a lot of people in home-making and bible study. This blog is more or less a 'hate blog'.

So yeah.. 'don't you have anything better to do with your time?' from me as well.. Doesn't God tell us to focus on life's positive things? If anyone did wrong unto you.. let it be.. God will account them for it, let us not waste our time on writing a hate blog for heaven's sake..

(and don't come telling me this ISN'T a hate blog.. I'll just laugh at ya ;) )

Nancy Parode said...

Linda,

Perhaps you should re-read some of Candy's posts about the Catholic Church before you label her blog as "mostly positive." No one here has ever called the church Candy attends a "great whore," but that is what she calls my church. That, IMHO, definitely qualifies as hate speech. Certainly, were those words applied to, say, the church President Bush or Senator Obama attends, the media would be all over it.

Elena said...

Well laugh away Linda because it's not a hate blog.

Let me tell you something that I have learned since I was 23. Hate takes an amazing amount of physical and emotional energy to maintain. It damages the soul and dampens the spirit.

You reach a point in your life where you have to decide what you want to do with the rest of your energy, with your spirit, your soul, your mental energies. I came to the conclusion that where I wanted to end up, who I wanted to be, and how I wanted to be remembered had very little to do with hate. Consequently I can tell you that I don't hate anyone. i sleep well at night and I have lots of energy.

This blog is about telling the truth about the Catholic church. That is not hateful.

There is a hate blog out there. I can refer you if you like. (e-mail me) Perhaps you need to see the difference.

Saved Sinner said...

"Of course this other lady is acting this way, but she is being very careful and gracious. She may be attacking our faith, but not a person."
I beg to correct you: She does single people out. She singled me out personally by addressing me in a full post. Instead of just replying to me personally and saying, "No I didn't get your original comment but I don't agree with you anyway" it was made into a big thing by her addressing me personally in a full blog post. She also told her readers my comment was "rediculous" without actually showing them it. Also although she herself has not accused me of attacking her, her readers who did not see my original comment got that impression and she continues to publish (and therefore condone) their comments saying that I was attacking her. It is not "careful and gracious" to publish untruths about someone else even if the commenters mistakenly believe the untruth. I have had comments criticising Candy which I have chosen not to publish purely because I feel they make an unfair and untrue (although genuinely mistaken and not attacking) criticism and I therefore think it would be wrong of me to publish them. The VTC bloggers have strict rules about making unfair criticisms about Candy but sadly she does not have a similar policy.

angie said...

I find it pretty hypocritical to say, "How can they find the time?" when one person is running a very active blog with a giant to-do list, the visitors to that blog have time to read and carry on conversations in the comment box, and they have the time to come here and read this blog too. I have wondered how Candy does it, but I've never had thoughts that she isn't taking care of her family- I just assume she's a great multi-tasker.

Before I knew this site existed, I tried so hard to communicate with Candy. I sent her a comment, which she did not publish, pleading with her to stop the anti-Catholic essays, but I praised her efforts to help women live out their vocation of motherhood. I was led to her blog by a google search on forms for homemakers as I was looking for a nice scheduling chart for my family. What first struck me was that her helpful hints to moms was similar to Holly Pierlot's book A Mother's Rule of Life (which is a book written by a devout Catholic). I thought, "This is great- she might have some more information that will help me." So, I'm reading along, and then she wrote the essay, "The Whore of Babylon." I was so upset. Then she continued spreading false information, and I got into a dialogue with her one afternoon, which she did publish to her blog. When my husband came home, I burst into tears because I felt so frustrated that she was able to say these things and have people making comments that made it seem like she was infallible in her interpretation of scripture. Also, I had never had someone personally insult me like that- telling me that my interpretation of scripture was "just stupid" and that I was headed straight to hell. I felt so alone, and even though she is a stranger to me and I don't agree with her, it hurt me to the core. If that's not a hate blog, I don't know what is.

I was so relieved to discover this site because it is well-moderated to keep hateful, attacking comments from taking away from the information. It is a safe place where I can learn more about my faith, and I can see that I am not by myself. I admire you (Elena, Kelly and Erika) for being able to share this job and balancing your time to take care of your families. You have given me the gift of being able to sleep at night. For a time, I would lay awake trying to think of a way to get through to Candy, and that was such a great waste of time because no matter how nicely I put it, she would use my words to try to publically humiliate me and claim it was out of love.

Katrina- I fear that your friends are church are buying into Candy's claims. They really need to make some time to do some research and maybe spend some time in front of the Blessed Sacrament. If you don't believe in His presence there, I don't know what else would convince you.

KitKat said...

Hi Linda! I am sorry if you see this blog as a hate blog. Often times, when a person or a group of people has their religion, views, race, etc. attacked without being able to defend themselves it is possible that they will occasionally say or do things out of anger or hurt that they otherwise would not do. But Elena and her fellow bloggers are very careful to keep this blog as an apologetics blog IN RESPONSE TO the many misconceptions of the Catholic faith that are posted over at Candy's blog. They honestly try to keep it from turning into personal attacks on Candy. This blog is simply a forum where the anti-Catholicism posts on Candy blog can be refuted because we are not given that opportunity on Candy's own blog.

Some people have commented that Candy's blog is positive. Yes, her homemaking articles are useful. But her articles about the Catholic Church are often times anything but sweet. Refering to the Catholic Church as the "Whore of Babylon", "The Great Whore", anti-Christian, and a cult certainly does not feel loving to me. Yes, she says that she tries to save us with these types of posts because she loves us. She must "save us" and others from evil Catholicism. Yep, I feel the love......

I guess that this is one of those things that is difficult to understand unless it is your faith that is being misrepresented and villanized over and over again. Please know that just as Candy says that she loves us and therefore must save us, we also love her as our Sister in Christ. But that doesn't mean that we should allow her to slander the Catholic Church without trying to set the record staight. She says that she is called by the Holy Spirit to reveal the "deceptions" of the Catholic Church. In that case, I am called by the Holy Spirit to defend a faith that many people misunderstand. I mean her no harm personally and I would gladly stop discrediting her articles if she would simply stop posting them. I am just not sure that will ever happen. :(

Kelly said...

Angie, did you read through the past entries of this blog? Because I actually wrote two posts about your exchange with Candy, but that was before this more recent one that she put up. The thought occurred to me that you might not know we posted about your original exchange here, too.

Anyway, you can type "Angie" in the search box, and I'm sure it'll pop right up. :)

angie said...

Kelly- yes, I did read back, and even though I didn't know it at the time (sure wish I did!) it made me happy that someone had my back. I wish I was as articulate as you ladies, but then if I was, Candy wouldn't have published my comments. LOL This experience has made me really see how much I need to work on the way I communicate my thoughts. :)

Amanda said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Tracy said...

well, Amanda, I don't have a problem with her upbeat attitude, I have a friend who is upbeat all the time (or to me she is) we don't want to start nit picking on Candy over this. My only issue is the incorrect information on the Catholic church.. we really need to be careful, imo:)

Elena said...

Amanda, you might want to look at Candy's latest post. Yea, she really was pretty sick a while back and we even prayed for her here.

Erika S. said...

Oh yeah this post is on how I find so much time to blog and not neglect my family. I pretty much do it the same way as Candy, except that I try to follow "A Mother's Rule of Life" by Holly Pierlot. I know a while back I started doing an online book discussion on VTC with that same book. Things in my life got really crazy for a while and I had to stop. If anyone is interested I will restart the Book Discussion.

Blondie said...

And Candy says: "I would say thank you for your prayers, but yours are empty and meaningless." An exact copy & paste of one of her hate-filled comments directed to a Catholic. I tell you what, it takes a lot to continue praying for a person who has insulted you like that.

Holly Pierlot's book is great! Erika, I would be interested in a summer book discussion. I recently found my copy after our move! My kids are still homeschooling right now, but hopefully by July we'll be done. It's been a couple of years, and I would like to reread it this summer.

As has been pointed out here before, Candy did not invent the idea of a home management binder, or whatever you want to call it. Off the top of my head, a couple of wonderful homemaking books that have information about making these kinds of binders/notebooks are Confessions of an Organized Housewife by Deniece Schofield, and The Family Manager by Kathy Peel. The first time I ever put something like this together was probably 10 years ago, when I ran across www.organizedhome.com. They call it a "household notebook." There is a wealth of information on that site, as well as all kinds of free, printable downloads. Of course, many people may be familiar with Flylady's "Control Journal" - same concept.

I also enjoyed Teri Maxwell's book Managers of Their Homes. This book really helped me devise a workable schedule as a homeschooling mom. (In fact, after reading it in 2001, I emailed a copy of my own schedule to Teri and she included it in the back of her next edition of MOTH!)

Erika S. said...

I second Tracy's comment. One of the things that I do like about Candy's Blog is that she is positive and upbeat.

Kelly said...

Amanda, I wanted to let you know that while your post was not against our commenting guidelines, I removed it because of the timing with Candy's latest post.

I'm sure a lot of her commenters think that we are the ones who have been spamming her with this criticism, and some of them come here to confirm their theories.

So please don't take it personally, but I thought it best to remove your comment in erring on the side of caution.

Amanda said...

No problem Kelly; honestly, I was a bit concerned when I posted it initially, but figured I would leave it up to your discretion.

Tracy said...

oh Blondie, I was unaware of that comment to a Catholic who was praying for her, I feel so bad for that person to be treated with such spirit of unkindness:(